I’ve been estranged from Mimmette, the writer. For the past decade I have been preoccupied with life, so I tell myself. But the truth is that it has taken me this long to cast away all (most) of my fears that prevented me from just doing it, this writing thing.
I made lots of excuses for myself. For most of my 20s it was because I was finding myself, figuring out who I was and how my multicultural background fit in with the idea of the kind of life I wanted or hoped to live.
Then in my 30s I used life events such as falling in love, getting married and having children as excuses for not having the time to write. If anything, it should have been sources of inspiration to write!
So finally, now I’ve left my thirties, and pretty much figured out most things I needed to after living in my head a lot since my teens, I have reached a point where I no longer have excuses.
All I have now are many many reasons why I should just start writing. Start all the writing projects I’ve always had in mind since my 20s. And even start all other creative endeavours and business ideas that I’ve formulated in my head.
My main motivation now is the saying that goes like this; If you don’t try at all, you’ve already failed. And since I’ve been so afraid of failure all these years, it was enough of a kick in the butt to start writing.
The other big factor in overcoming my fear in doing the things I’ve been wanting to do, are my two children.
It’s a tragic world we live in today with many things in the political and social arena making me feel so hopeless and helpless at the same time. But I want my children to live their best lives and to never give up trying to live their best lives, regardless of how the world is turning to shit.
So what better way to ensure they do this, than by leading by example? I don’t want to be one those mothers who need to tell their children, “Do as I say, not as I do.”
Finally, I am writing again. I don’t know where this is going to take me, but at least I am writing again.
And it feels good.